Kira’s Story: Young, Black & Deadly

I am Kira, a young woman who has been through a lot, but I’m also proud to say I am working towards my goals!

I’m bright, kind and energetic, but I’ve also struggled with mental health issues such as anxiety, depression and Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). I’ve tried my best to overcome these issues, but they have hung over me like a dark cloud. I grew up in Housing flats and gang violence was a part of everyday life. I was involved in big gangs and surrounded by drugs, violence and alcohol at a young age.

I think of my drug use as a form of self-medication, taking away my feelings and my pain. But it also impacted my work and studies, and exacerbated my mental health issues, leading to agoraphobia and panic attacks for no reason. I was arrested and sent to prison a few times.

I was in a very dark place before I got to prison this time. With the help of drugs I pushed my feelings down and in one way I felt like things didn’t affect me at all. My emotions and feelings had died. But I still felt so much grief. It felt like my whole life had amounted to nothing. If it had not been for my family and the women I’ve previously done time with, I’m not sure if I would have pulled through. I’ve tried to keep in good spirits and think about good times and good memories and moments in my life, to get in a good mindset. I always tell myself that what doesn’t kill me only makes me stronger. I also try and look for positive goals throughout the day, no matter how small or big.

For me, the secret to change is to focus all your energy not on looking back fighting the old, but on building the new you. Sometimes the smallest step in the right direction ends up being the biggest step of your life. Tiptoe if you like but take the step!

When I leave prison, I want to keep improving my outlook on life and developing a range of skills to reach my goals of becoming abstinent and changing my life. I need support that’s non-judgemental and consistent so I can regain my independence and become financially self-sufficient.

It might take time but it’s also worth it, especially for my own 2 loving kids. I didn’t know what love was until I brought 2 beautiful kids into this world.

It takes courage and resilience to be who you really are in a society that mostly denies your existence.

I know there is plenty of support out there. I just have to ask for it when I need it!

Amen, Aloha!!